You're not what we wanted!

[becomingun.livejournal.com]

So I don't think I've posted this before but if I have, forgive me - It's just that terrible.

My mom reminded me about a lady we know whose name is Hughnie which in and of itself isn't bad, but the origins of the name are pretty awful.  So she has older sisters, several of them, and her dad always wanted a boy to name after himself(Hugh), but her mom said "only one more baby!" so he pinned all of his hopes on the baby being a boy.  Well, obviously she wasn't, so he named her Hughnie, which in their language means "Not Hugh." As in "you're not the son I wanted."

My mother thinks this is funny, and while I kind of agree I also think it's pretty messed up.

(I should edit: she's in her 50's now, and has a pretty good sense of humor about it.)

Comments

[jeweledvixen.livejournal.com]

That is a horrible thing to do to a child. They are sentencing her to a lifetime of daily reminders that she is not what they wanted. That's a selfish and cruel thing for her parents to do to her.

[piperwest12.livejournal.com]

This!!! SMH

[pirahan.livejournal.com]

Eh. Sounds the same as expecting a Brandon and naming her Brandy instead, without really going over anything else.

[stacyinthecity.livejournal.com]

If it were as simple as Brandon -> Brandy I'd agree. But it sounds like in whatever language they speak natively, the -nie suffix is some sort of negation. So it is more like Brandon -> Nobrandon.

If this story is true, I think it is a pretty bad name to give a child. It is like all the little girls in India named "Unwanted" - which is a true and documented phenomenon.

[the-pyre.livejournal.com]

I seriously think I've heard this somewhere before. I'm probably remembering it because my father's name is Hugh.

[mrsduryee.livejournal.com]

I think it's pretty terrible, but if she and her father have a good relationship and she doesn't feel her childhood was affected by her father's lack of a son, then I can laugh along with them. The way a parent feels after the birth of a child is so volatile and manic. Not everyone feels they already have a relationship with the child when he or she is born; some have to develop a bond. Because of the weird emotions that parents might have at the beginning, I think it's wise to choose two names if you don't know the sex of the baby, and stick to your choice, so you don't make a stupid decision about the name in that crazy state of mind.

[roseofjuly.livejournal.com]

I think it's hilarious, but I don't interpret it as "not the son I wanted," but more like "you are not a boy!"

I have a friend who's dad pretty clearly wanted a son and all through her mom's pregnancy thought she might be a son. He had a name picked out for him: Jonathan. Well, she wasn't, and so it took them a while to come up with a name (they chose Jennifer). She changed her name recently for cultural reasons, but while she didn't like her name she didn't seem to resent the fact that her father wanted a boy. He very clearly loves his two daughters. So I come from it with that perspective.

[sweetest-asylum.livejournal.com]

growing up my neighbors had five girls. they named their 5th girl paula after her dad then years later they had a boy and named him paul.

also knew of a werdna...andrew backwards

[alyssa22.livejournal.com]

My mum taught a girl called Douglasina. Because her father wanted a boy called Douglas, after himself.

[owlzen.livejournal.com]

I went to school with a girl named Ryanne, Ryan, after her dad because she was not a boy! I thought it was cool as a kid.