Annoyed....

[elizebethjoy.livejournal.com]

I'm a little appalled after reading some of the responses in gothikbutterfly's post. Specifically, when folks were saying stuff to the effect of "what were they thinking?" in reference to the parents of someone with an "odd" name. Really, what do you do when you meet someone whose parents were from the Ukraine, or some other place where the names aren't familiar to most Americans? Do you really make a snap judgement on that person's parents? Don't you think that's a little closed-minded? How about assuming something good, like that their parents are from an exotic place, or have a interesting family background?

On a slightly different topic: I know people feel strongly about names, but tact is an important part of being a member of society. It IS possible to not like a name, or a person's opinion, and not trash that person using strong and, sometimes, innapropriate language. It would be great practise to try to phrase your opinions in such a way that you don't cause new members to run away crying. I mean, come on, gothikbutterfly's baby was due yesterday, and some of you treated her like garbage. Couldn't you find a more eloquent way of expressing yourself?

And for the record, there were some posts from people who didn't like the names she suggested, and were able to say so in a way that fostered conversation and constructive feedback. Thank you so much for being here and for speaking up.

Comments

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[desert-vixen.livejournal.com]

I have to disagree.

I didn't see anyone being "appalling". Were there deleted posts, or something? Because the strongest thing I saw was along the lines of "it's an anime cartoon".

I think most of the points were constructive (mentioning that changing the spelling would make pronunciation easier ; that you're giving your child future harrassment potential if they're continually having to explain how to spell/pronounce the name).

DV

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[elizebethjoy.livejournal.com]

I'm probably a bit sensitive right now, as I'm in week 8 of pregnancy and feeling every bit of it emotionally and physically. Put yourself in the place of a woman who is due to give birth any moment now, and re-read the thread. Some things that were said simply could have been worded more gently and still have gotten the point across. Also, when people talk respond to what I have said with respect and thought, as you have, I'm much more likely to take what they have said to heart.

---------------------------------

(This is a bit off-topic, but...)

My name is Elizebeth, and while I do have to correct the spelling a good bit for others, it doesn't bother me a bit. Having a more "unique" spelling makes it easier for people to remember, and I'm proud to carry the name that my mother and father gave me. Granted, my name isn't as "weird" as it could be (like Ylyzybyth), I have never felt harrassed because of it.

But I don't want this thread to be about just about weird spellings. :) Mutual respect for posters is more important to me.

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[quiet-recluse.livejournal.com]

Uh, where I come from Elizabeth is standard spelling and Elisabeth is an uncommon but acceptable deviation. I don't think that's weird at all.

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[elizebethjoy.livejournal.com]

Mine is spelled with an "e" in the middle instead of an "a." ;)

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[quiet-recluse.livejournal.com]

Ah, right, sorry - I'm misreading everything today.

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[desert-vixen.livejournal.com]

Put yourself in the place of a woman who is due to give birth any moment now, and re-read the thread. Some things that were said simply could have been worded more gently and still have gotten the point across.

I appreciate what you're saying, but not everyone is going to be nice about this stuff all the time. If things had gotten ugly, I feel sure that our moderator a_green_faerie (?) would have clamped down on it, because they seem to be good about not letting people be abusive.

I'm working my way through month eight now, so I sympathize with the hormones on both sides of the issue.

DV

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[ladyartemisa.livejournal.com]

You said exactly what I was thinking.