A call to you all

[silver05.livejournal.com]

Lately, when I read the posts left in this community, I become increasingly frustrated. It seems that this community isn't so much a site to suggest name ideas and receive feedback, but simply a place to list names we find stupid and then laugh at them. It feels like we are the popular girls laughing and looking down our noses at the other girls in the cafeteria.

What is so bad about names spelled differently?

What is so bad about naming children after places?

What is so bad about popular names?

Why should any of this affect us and what we choose to name our children?

Comments

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[miss-tee.livejournal.com]

sure there are some posts about "I can't believe someone would name their kid that!!!" but the majority is "here is my name list please comment" or "so and so named their kid such and such, what do you think?"
The whole point of this community, I thought, was to get people's unbiased opinions about names.
So some people are for and some are against "creatively" spelled names.
Some people like place names and some think it's tacky.
Some people adore a certain name despite the fact that it is popular and some don't want their child to have the same name as anyone else in their class.

This is a place to bounce ideas off one another. Alot of people would rather discuss names with people on the internet because you can get truly unbiased opinions and if somone doesn't like the name you want to use, oh well you aren't going to see this person in real life anyway.

Someone might say, after posting or asking about names that "I guess I won't use this name after all cos I never realized it was so popular/out there/a place in cincinatti etc" but I don't think anyone is going to say "I am not going to name my child Ethel because the people on baby_names don't like it."

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

I've been seeing more and more often people simply listing off names they heard that they hate, rather than listing names they like and passing it around for general opinion. The latter is what this community is about.

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[fireyirishangel.livejournal.com]

I don't see a clear statement in the community info that one must post names they like and seek opinions. It says nothing about *not* listing names you don't like or think are odd.

No offense, but you're not a Mod (unless the info is out of date). Your opinion is just as valid as anyone else's here, but it's not up to you to say what this community is about.

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

Your point is valid; I am not a Mod and have no right to say what this community should and should not be. But I am a Member, which gives me the right to say what I do and don't like about this community. I do not like the posts that only list names to say how horrible they are, and I wish they would stop.

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[fireyirishangel.livejournal.com]

As I said in one of my two comments, your opinion is just as valid as anyone else's here. I just wouldn't expect people to change the way they use the community for your sake.

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[rebl1969.livejournal.com]

I do not like the posts that only list names to say how horrible they are, and I wish they would stop.

Heh. I love those posts, they make me laugh. And cringe. Then laugh some more.

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[godmod.livejournal.com]

Me too!

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[mrsduryee.livejournal.com]

What in the world is an "unbiased opinion?" Oxymoron of the millennium! :)

Aside from that, this comment explains it all.

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[th3-unicorn.livejournal.com]

I see what you mean, honestly, but I think because the subject of naming is so important to each of us (or otherwise we wouldn't be here) then we all very personal taste and it's easy for basically everyone to dislike their fellow's preferences. I do see more criticism than praise now than in the past.

I'm with you on the two questions in the middle, I'm partial about the first one, and I have an answer for the last one: if someone doesn't care about people's opinions about naming choices, then this community is simply not for them :)

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[ladyartemisa.livejournal.com]

so i guess that we should keep our mouths quiet if we dont like a name?
is that what you are suggesting?

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

Of course not! That's not what I mean at all. I'm refering to those posts where someone lists a name and says, "isn't that a horrid name? What an awful, awful name!" It strikes me as rude and unfair.

(frozen)

[isoldereverie.livejournal.com]

I really like this community because we get to exchange names from different cultures and generations. I love to hear new names and the etymological stories behind the names. I think this is a great place to "test the waters" for different names. A microcosm if you will to see how a name will be viewed by the general population. This is only as important as you let it be, but names that are not well received by society tend to place the person at a disadvantage in life.

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

This is why I joined this community also. I just haven't seen a lot of etymology and sharing of cultures lately.

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[morphinae.livejournal.com]

...So post one?

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[sarahrose.livejournal.com]

While I often don't hesitate to post "bad" names, I agree with you.

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[fireyirishangel.livejournal.com]

In a generic community about baby names, you're bound to come across all sorts of posts. The bulk of the ones I've seen here are "here's my list of names, what do you think?" or "here's birth announcements/class lists from my area, what do you think?" Yes, there are occasional "I heard this name and think it's horrendous" but I fail to see the huge issue with it, particularly since the community information doesn't say anything about avoiding posts such as those.

If you don't like them, think they're rude, skip 'em. You'll be hard-pressed to find a community of any topic, anywhere on LJ, that perfectly fits your vision of what it should be. Unless, of course, you create and Mod the community and make it fit your wants.

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[girlsknowbest.livejournal.com]

you could call it "baby_names_adored_and_loved_by_all"

or "BNAABA" for short.

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

Haha. I don't mind that people don't like names; I do mind that people make posts to say that they don't like these names. You don't like 'em? Don't name someone that.

(frozen) i get it.

[girlsknowbest.livejournal.com]

i guess we should all be so lucky to have so much free time. haha.

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[morphinae.livejournal.com]

Because the rules clearly state this is a place to discuss names, period. Not just names we like, but names we might not? It's fun to be shocked over something we've never seen before.

This isn't the happy-happy, joy-joy community, sometimes we come across bad names and share. This is perfectly within reason and partly why I created this community. You're in the wrong place if you want 'nice-nice' all the time. That's ridiculous.

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

Gaaaaah. I don't want "nice-nice" all the time. I'm just protesting against posts that all that they do is list a name and say how much they hate it.

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[morphinae.livejournal.com]

I will never understand why people on the internet lack the simple skill of just LOOKING PAST something they don't care for, instead of taking the time to read it, and then taking EVEN MORE time complaining about what they read. If you don't like it, don't read it?

It's that simple, I promise.

(frozen)

[tokossel.livejournal.com]

i agree with you re looking past stuff that you don't agree with. the only thing with this community is that a lot of the posts here strike me as extremely classist. like, 'oh, only low-income people who aren't EDUCATED would give their child a kreativ name'. it's frustrating.

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[morphinae.livejournal.com]

And don't forget young parents. That irks me to no end as well. It's not just young parents naming their kids stupid shit, there's plenty of 30 and 40 somethings doing it too. I was a young parent, I managed to not name my kid something stupid and misspell it. I don't appreciate being lumped into an inaccurate category by people who want to be all holier-then-thou.

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[sandtree.livejournal.com]

My view on the matter is, if you don't want opinions, don't ask for them. If you want to name your kid Adysynne, or Denver, or Aiden, go ahead and do it. But if you post here, people are going to tell you what they think.

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[godmod.livejournal.com]

We know what kind you are talking about, but I think you're the only one who has an issue with them.

I think they are fun. They generate discussion and you get to find out about names like Marc Kerr. You get to see what kind of names there are out there, as opposed to the everyday names like Madeline Grace.

Honestly, I'm tired of the other posts. The ones that are like,
"Hey, should I name my kids boringname + boringname? If, and when, I ever actually get pregnant?"

[morphinae.livejournal.com]

Ok, now you're making me mad, you're just trying to be inflammatory, which is not tolerated. I've frozen the comments.

If you have SUCH a huge issue what what goes on here, you're welcome to leave. Or at least ATTEMPT to peacefully change it instead of start an argumentative bitch-fest. Don't like negative posts? Post some positive names. (I have not seen you do this.) Don't like that we don't have posts with history and etymology? Post some. (You haven't done this either.)

I can't stand it when people don't attempt to put any effort into turning something their way, and just skip ahead to whining about it. Act, or shut up.

This will be the end of it.

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[silver05.livejournal.com]

I didn't mean to start an argumentative bitch-fest. I just thought that someone ought to say, hey, I don't like everything going on here. It got a little out of hand.

I've already left, but I would like to take note with the "I have have not seen you post some positive names" issue.

http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1766970.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1757669.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1747116.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1747116.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1721902.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1702207.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1675674.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1663001.html
http://community.livejournal.com/baby_names/1647438.html

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[morphinae.livejournal.com]

You have way too much time on your hands.

[scouty.livejournal.com]

O.o

oops...what happened here ?

[zodiacstargazer.livejournal.com]

wank. *shrug*

[unbakedbrownie.livejournal.com]

Try to keep in mind that ideas are a little more difficult to convey over the internet. So, something that might *sound* like bitchiness is not always so. People can present names that are outstanding, or unique, to inquire, etc, to them and provide their own opinion. Not everyone is going to just adore all names.

It really sounds like the last question is

[unbakedbrownie.livejournal.com]

Scratch that last bit. I wasn't going anywhere with it.

[silver05.livejournal.com]

I mean posts like this:

"I just _____ name from ______ place. Isn't this a horrible name?"

What is the purpose of those posts other than to be mean-spirited and have everyone agree with you?

[queen-mab.livejournal.com]

To marvel over the stupidity of the human race? =\

[silver05.livejournal.com]

I've deleted some comments. Please don't get mad. They were arguing the wrong points. The main point in the post is "It seems that this community isn't so much a site to suggest name ideas and receive feedback, but simply a place to list names we find stupid and then laugh at them" and the posts I deleted only pertained to the last four questions, which were superfluous. Some of the posts I deleted actually agreed with me. Others didn't. I just didn't want the confusion over what we were arguing about to continue.