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[chillinbabejodi.livejournal.com]

Is there anything that would stop you using a name you loved? For example, pronunciation issues(something little like someone can't make a "-TH" sound like in Beth/Nathan or a big issue like the person not being able to say the name at all)/family members with similar names etc. Would you use a name even if someone asked you not to. I mean this both in the sense that your friend/family member wanted a name would you still use it? Maybe as a middle name rather than a first? More importantly though, if someone close to you passed away would you want to use their name? Would you feel like you HAD to use the name? How would you feel if someone asked you not to use the name? What about if you REALLY liked the name regardless of the person?

Comments

[ladydreamfire.livejournal.com]

Nowadays there wouldn't be much that would make me NOT use a name. I stopped caring about if a name was liked by my family, and/or if it was super popular. We're no longer keen on sharing our chosen name with people we know in real life, with a few exceptions. In those cases we enjoy using a "placeholder" name. We used Zebulon Yul (Changed to Zebulina when we realized we were having a girl). It wasn't until my baby shower that we shared the name. I had to stop caring about names other people were trying to "claim". I will sort of respect long favored names from family members, but only if we're close. If I don't see you or speak to you why would it matter if our kids have the same name?

I also don't make a habit out of "namesakes". I can see and respect why most people do, but for me it's a headache. I get worried that it would seem like playing favorites with my family or his family and that is a headache I do not want. I had a son who died and thought maybe I would try to honor him in some way, but decided against that too. I thought it best for us just to give our children names all their own.

[iqsi.livejournal.com]

I decided at age four I would name my daughter Daciana Faye. Nothing is swaying me. I mean that in the most thorough sense. If anything, being told not to do something makes me want to do it more out of sheer defiance. In the event my cousin Daciana dies before I have a daughter I'm using it, and if she asked me not to I'd swap it out to a middle name instead.

I don't play well with others.

[mrssubee.livejournal.com]

We really wanted to use Chiara for my daughter and name her after my grandmother who passed- we both loved the name and then, I got nervous and started to think no one will know how to pronounce it- it's "Key-R- uh" but I didn't want to change the spelling to accommodate people who didn't know how to pronounce, so left it...if we were going with it anyway and someone (like my mom) had been upset about us using her mother's name and asked us not to- we probably would've respected her wishes and not done it..by the way, we changed out our minds about midway through the pregnancy

[http://users.livejournal.com/-dahling-/]

Wow, that's a LOT of questions. lol I tend to steer away from any family names period. That being said, if it were a name I'd always loved but a family member happened to have that name, I would still use it. Depending on the situation, if someone died and a family member asked me not to use that name, i would consider it. I would not feel obligated to give that name to my child.

One name that i love is James but the possessive form of names ending in 's' is weird so if we choose that name, I think we'll use it as a middle name just so I can avoid that issue.

[octobre09.livejournal.com]

The only thing that has kept me from using a name is a person: my husband, lol. Like it or not, when you share a child with someone they do have a say in the matter. They are many names that I would have liked to use but he didn't like any of them. Luckily the one name that I absolutely adored, he also liked. That was for our first daughter, Cléa. For our second daughter though, he wanted nothing to do with my choices. We eventually settled on Sophie which I didn't absolutely love but in the end it worked out great. She definitely is a Sophie.:)

There is one name that I didn't use because it's the only name that my sister wants for a future daughter and I respected that. Basically, naming children is hard. So if there is a name that you LOVE and your significant other, if applicable, agrees, then use it.

[daydream11.livejournal.com]

Anastasia has been on my list since I was five and picked up my first baby name book (also, the film), but ever since "50 Shades of Gray" I've been wary about it. Chances are nobody will remember the connection by the time I have children, but it still bothers me. I don't think anybody would be against me using any of my faves - they're nobody's taste in my circles, and nobody I know has them - so I wouldn't worry. The only thing I could foresee pressure on is having a boy and my dad wanting me to name my son after him, especially since I'm the only one who carries the family name.

[desert-sailor.livejournal.com]

Is there anything that would stop you using a name you loved?
I think the only thing that would stop me from using a name In liked was if it was the same name as a horrible murderer or something that I was familiar with. Like, thanks to the CO shootings, James got scratched off the list.

Would you use a name even if someone asked you not to?
As long as it sounds good together and both my husband and I liked it, I don't care if the rest of the world hates my choice. It's my baby, my reasons, my choice in the end.

More importantly though, if someone close to you passed away would you want to use their name? Would you feel like you HAD to use the name? How would you feel if someone asked you not to use the name? What about if you REALLY liked the name regardless of the person?
Again, if I liked the name and so did my husband, I'd use the name. We've set in stone our future sons name and no one is going to talk us out of it because honestly, there's not a lot of names we really agree on and stay with for awhile, so if we do find one, we keep it. :)

[dustthouart.livejournal.com]

I think I disagree with most people here, which is funny because I love names so much. But names are just names. They aren't worth hurting other people.

Of course some people are unreasonable and will try to use names as a power struggle, and you can't hope to please everyone with a name--someone is going to dislike it. But if someone I loved came to me and asked me as a personal favor not to use name X because reason Y, I would definitely give it a lot of thought. And even if I felt like I really wanted to use the name, I would try to work it out, not simply say "tough titties if you don't like it, sister-in-law! I DO WHAT I WANT."

Maybe I would feel differently if I didn't like so many different names, or if my husband and I could only agree on a very few names, but to me, to cross out a name, even one I adore, is worth it to make someone else happy, because I adore so many more names than I will ever be able to use, even if I have ten kids!

[alyssa22.livejournal.com]

My mum wanted to use Stuart for a boy. But my cockney relatives in England (where we lived at the time) said "What Sht-OO-ut"? And she was all "No, I think I'll go with Cameron".

Personally, I like the name Naomi (pronounced Nay-OH-me) but everyone says Nye-OH-me, which I can't stand. Not that I'm having kids, but that would be one that I love that I'd never use, because of the 'nyeomi' pronunciation.

[octobre09.livejournal.com]

I love Naomi but I pronounce it the French way, Nah-oh-me. Unless you are French, you probably won't pronounce it that way which is why I didn't go for it.

[lovetherobots.livejournal.com]

My name is Beth, and I couldn't pronounce the "th" sound until I was about 5-6 years old. I remember feeling really awkward when people didn't understand when I was saying my own name! That being said, I plan to stay away from names that are very difficult for little people to pronounce for our future little ones!

[so-there.livejournal.com]

yep. a lot of reasons. pronunciation is one (I love Anselm but find it awkward to say so I haven't used it yet.) too close to a family name is another (I liked Micah but my husband has a brother Mike and that's too close.. plus it's getting too common anyway). political figure (Hillary was my #1 name as a kid and I still like it, it's not too common, but I just can't use it). if someone asked me not to use a name I'd probably not use it. at this point i have 3 girls and 2 boys, so if i was thinking of using a name, it would be either my 3rd or 4th choice, depending on the sex, and if it was someone's first choice I wouldn't want to steal it form them. for example when I already had a boy and a girl, I found out my husband's brother and his soon-to-be (a the time,now current) wife had a name chosen for a first boy, and it was my second (and therefore next) choice for a boy. i had another boy before they had one, but I did not use the name, I let them have it.

as for someone close to me dying, I would only consider their name as a middle name anyway, and I would hope no one would bother me about a middle name. one criterion I have for a first name is not knowing anyone with that name, including deceased relatives (or friends).