Same names in the family?

[starcrossed.livejournal.com]

I always loved the name James for a boy. My grandfather, one of the most special people in my life was called James and his father was called James also. It's a family tradition the the eldest sons in the family are named James.

However, my mom's cousin (different 'strand' of the family) has a son named James. I see his grandmother quite regularly so I wouldn't want people to see it as copying if I named my future son James or for people to have to make distinctions (like 'Becky's James' or 'Sharon's James.')

I have other 'J' names I like okay (Jack or Joseph or Jackson) but it sounds clunky to have James as the middle name with some of those. I've also thought about an entirely different name althogether like 'Matthew' and then add in James as the middle name.

I just really want to honor my grandfather by calling my first son (if I have a son) James but don't want to see like I'm copying or stolen the name.

Has anyone else been in a similar situation or have any perspective on this?

Comments

[the-pyre.livejournal.com]

I think James is a common enough name that it would hardly be considered copying.

[jeweledvixen.livejournal.com]

You have legitimate personal reasons for naming your son James. I don't think the other branch of the family would consider it copying if you used James.

[brittmarie.livejournal.com]

IA.

[twinklieetoes.livejournal.com]

I can see where you're coming from, we were put in this situation 4 years ago before my son was born, and we wanted to name ours James too, but his cousin's son is already james and we see them all the time.
Difference is that you have a very good reason to use the name (we just liked it!) Maybe it would be easier for that side of the family to have a petname/nickname for him? Not an easy situation!

[harinakshi.livejournal.com]

I like the name Alexander (more for a middle name) but my FIL and my nephew in law are named Alex, I felt that was too close to even consider the name. And while I would have loved to use my great grandma's name, Edith, I have a cousin with the name so it's off the table as well. But...Your mom's cousin's child would make that your third cousin and your child's fourth cousin, right? I think that's far enough removed to use the name without worry.

[solitudete.livejournal.com]

Perhaps you could use something like Jameson? It would be legitimate too, as the son of James. But if you're not keen on Jameson, I say name your child what you like. He's yours and whether it looks like you're copying or not, your family will know (or hear) the reason for it. The other side of the family could have a nickname for him as well, as Twinklieetoes mentioned.

[coendou.livejournal.com]

It's a very common name (in the top 20), and you have a strong family reason - I don't think yu need to worry. If they get upset they've got some problems.

[laminy.livejournal.com]

If it's a family tradition, then isn't everyone already sort of copying everyone else? You have a pretty good reason to use it, I'm sure nobody would protest.

Or go with Séamus.

[requiem-morrow.livejournal.com]

James is awesome. Its been one of my favorite names forever. Does the other James have a nn? There will be years between them. I wouldn't worry about it.

[winninghearts.livejournal.com]

It'd be one thing if his name was Bartholomew, but it's James. It's extremely common and I think it's fine.

[duckduckcaboose.livejournal.com]

My mom's aunt is named Anne. My mom is Ann Christine. Her father's brother had a daughter Anne C(I forget what but not Christine) a few years later. The original Anne is the sister of my grandfather so obviously both brothers loved their sister and wanted to honor her. My mom's cousin Anne married Michael in 1980. My uncle Craig's son is named Kenneth Michael (b. 1984). My aunt Janet (Craig's sister)'s son is named Michael Anthony (b. 1988).

So... that's just one example of common names used a lot in one branch of my family. It's never been a problem. Contextually, we usually know who's being talked about and if not it's not a big deal to say "Aunt Anne" or "Cousin Annie"

[snoglobel.livejournal.com]

I don't know the history behind this, but my dads name is Brian and his youngest (closest in age to himself at only 9 years old) uncle is also Brian. They are close, not distant cousins, and as far as I know there was no family history of the name before them.

I don't think it ever caused a problem or any confusion. They often went by "big Brian" and "little Brian", which worked until my dad got to be nearly a foot taller and no longer fit the "little brian" name. I've also heard them both called by their full names: "Brian Andrew" and "Brian Paul"

Moral of the long story - it wasn't a problem for us, and I'd say go for it, especially since it has family significance for you.

[snoglobel.livejournal.com]

*9 years older. Whoops.

Uncle Brian is 9 years older than Dad (Brian)

[arrien.livejournal.com]

My husband Kyle has a first cousin named Kyle. (my husband's mother and her brother named their kids the same). It's never been an issue :)

[autopsycorpses.livejournal.com]

You shouldn't have to give up on uyour dream name just because someone you know also has a kid that name. But, if it continues to bother you, how do you feel about the name Jameson, and using the nn James?

[qtshorty1625.livejournal.com]

I have Daniels and Marys (and probably other names) on both side of the family, and I think we just made it work.

I think too, that it would be unfair for someone to think that you're copying or stealing a name when it's not an unusual name.