Parenting Poll

[snoglobel.livejournal.com]

The previous owners of our house subscribed to Parenting (The early years) magazine.  We got the last issue before it was redirected to their new address.  It's been here for a while, so I apologize if this has been posted but I just got around to reading it and saw this poll:



46% Yes
54% No


Aquote from the No side:

"My name, Kelly, is extremely common.  I have found it frustrating my entire life - I still turn around when someone calls my name in a store.  So for my children I chose names that ended up being moderately common and spelled them very alternatively, so at least they wouldn't have the problem in school of always getting back the wrong paper." - "Amilianna"

and on the Yes side: "A name is just a name - millions of people share them every day!  In fact, if you're picking a more popular name, there's even a good chance that another baby in the hospital has it too!" - "Tina"  (To me another baby in the hospital and a close friend or family member are totally different...)

 What do you think?

Comments

[lind-saay.livejournal.com]

I don't think it's okay. Especially because the children are going to be around each other a lot. I also think it's just...I don't know. Weird. And not okay. I would NEVER do this. I love the name Lily, for example, but my best friend's daughter is named this. I would never use Lily, even though her child will likely be at least 10 years older than mine and we'll probably live in different time zones by the time I have kids. I just feel like it's copying or something. In a kind of creepy way.

The only time I think this is okay is if the name is a name your friend has picked and it's a name that's really important to you and/or your family. For example, if your family ALWAYS names the first born son James, and has for generations, and you've always wanted to follow the tradition and then your best friend ends up naming her son James, I think it's still okay to use it. Or if the naming tradition is in YOUR family, but your significant other's brother or sister or cousin uses the name, I still think it's okay. I would just inform them ahead of time and say, "Look. This is the situation. I have always planned on using that name. I'm still going to use that name. If you have a problem with it, let's deal with it now because I'm not changing my mind."

[brittmarie.livejournal.com]

I pretty much agree. The only way I don't agree with it is what she stated and if it is a name you have ALWAYS said you will name your child and your friend/family member suddenly decides they love it. I adore the name Olivia, and always have said I will name my girl Olivia. If I ever have a second daughter that will be her name, regardless of whether or not my name-stealing cousin name's her first daughter that. She's being an ass.

[harinakshi.livejournal.com]

I am very big about not using names of friends, old or current, their kids' names, or even relatives that are living. I'm also not big about spelling them differently to be "unique" I think it's more like being stupid. So they won't get back the wrong paper but they'll have to spell out their name to every person they talk to for the rest of their lives. UGH.

[pollysweet.livejournal.com]

I agree with not using a name that is in your family or husband's family. As for friends, I just wonder where the line is drawn? After all, somewhere between the level of best friend and someone you went to school with 20 years ago, there must be a point where a name becomes far enough removed to be used right?
I am trying to come up with a name for my second son who is due in January. We have trouble coming up with names that we agree on, and I just thought of a great name that I used to think was off limits because a lady I worked with used it on her son and I had never heard it before and loved it.
But I haven't worked with her in years and her son is at least 6 now. I wonder if it would be ok to use. I doubt anybody else would care, but I might feel funny or my husband might to think that we have "stolen" it.

Still, I wouldn't name my baby boy the same thing as someone I know he will spend time with in the future, like in the nursery at church or family reunions. I also would not use the same name as any friend I am close to even if they lived in another state and we never saw each other.

[compulsivelyme.livejournal.com]

In rapid succession last summer, my old friend, my cousin, and my stepbrother took my top names for babies (Amelia, Madeline, and Louisa).

Of course, now I have a bunch of names that I like better.

Be that as it may:
- I'm not naming my babies after any living relatives
- I'm not naming a baby the same name as a friend's baby, even a distant one, unless I truly love the name

In fact, I'm even balking at potentially naming a kid after someone I once knew. But you know what? There are a lot of people in this world and I don't want to give my baby a ridiculously unique name. So I'll keep Lydia on my list, even though a girl two years younger than me that I know in elementary school has that name, too.

[satunian.livejournal.com]

YOU B***H THAT'S MY NAME! hahaha just kidding. Well, not about Lydia, it's my #1, but I actually like hearing other people use it in this community. It's like confirmation it's a good name, especially since you guys can be the harshest critics of names!

[qalanjo.livejournal.com]

I'd vote no for naming a baby after a friend or family member's baby or young child, because then I feel like it's copying the name. But if you're naming the baby after someone as a namesake, and you tell the person "I want to name my baby after you", then I think that's fine. My baby will probably have family names.

[smallandneedy.livejournal.com]

I've loved my top girl name, Amanda, since I was 14, and I've always said that if someone uses that name for one of their kids, I will still use it. And I stand by that.

However, all the other names on my list I can probably be flexible with. It's just this name I've been completely in love with for such a long time that I can't imagine myself having a daughter and name her something else.

[sallymn.livejournal.com]

In my (admittedly large) family, there are two Briannas, three Johns, three Julies and four Michaels... and no one finds it a problem in the least. After all, even if you give up all the ones you like because someone else got them first - there's a good chance they'll be friends with, or marry someone with a relative called, or even change their own name, to some 'already claimed' one.

[catean.livejournal.com]

My friend and I got pregnant around the same time and we both, without discussing it, decided to name our sons James after men in our family. She calls her son Jack, but we will be calling ours James or Jamie. My husband actually likes Jack but I put my foot down because that's going too far.

I think if my husband and I could agree on another name we would go with it. But there is literally not another boy's name that we like. She doesn't seem to mind. And we've been growing apart in the last two years, so I honestly don't care if she minds.

[satunian.livejournal.com]

I do generally agree to try to avoid using the same name, at least around family and close friends. It really depends on how close you are. I have friends from elementary school on facebook having babies now, and if one of them happens to use a name i like, it wouldn;t necessarily dissuade me, but if it's a friend I keep in at least semi-regulat contact with, I'd avoid the name.

The only exception is for names that I've been saying for years I love and intend on using. If a best friend gets pregnant first, and suddenly MY favorite name out of the blue (like Charlotte's whole Shayla incident on Sex and the City) then 1)I don't give a damn, I claimed that name long ago, I'm still using it, and it's YOUR fault for giving our kids the same name, I don't care if yours was born first, you had at least a decade of warning and 2) you're really not much of a friend then, are you.

I'm thankful that there's really no one in my family I have to worry about (I might be the only one procreating anyway!) And my good friends have totally different naming styles than me and have already told me what they plan on using; one after her grandparents and the other, after her father and her favorite singer - I'm in the clear, woot!

[applesnpairs.livejournal.com]

Samantha: What's the matter?
Charlotte: She stole my baby name!!!!
Samntha: YOU BITCH. Let's go.


One of my favorite S&TC moments lol

[bluedano.livejournal.com]

The first comment you posted from the magazine totally made me laugh out loud. She hates that she has a common name and looks up when she hears someone say it, so she gave her children common names but spelled them kr8tively. Excellent logic. :D