this is seriously... disturbing... not that someone else will poick the name really because well if anythign the child can change it in th future but ifn the economy is sooo bad and you can't afford so many kids and it says on ebay she's a single mother... uh... keep your legs closed? use birthcontrol? Just don't pop out anymore kids for fuck's sake -_-
Her husband left her recently. She is in college to try to improve her situation. Why is nobody judging the father? He took off and apparently isn't paying child support.
because I didn't read that bit cause I was disgusted just with the e-bay thing... uh yeah and because it takes two to tango? Here's the thing... you can barely raise 6 kids? don't have a 7th. In the e-bay thing it mentions how her hosue is not big enough right? Well that means she has too many kids.
If she needs the money she goes to court and there she goes in front of a judge to ask for child support and if he can't pay for it then uh we're back to square one! Don't have 6 kids if you can't afford 6 kids. Much less 7.
Because circumstances never change! Especially not in this economy.
If you read the ebay questions and answers you would see that they were doing just fine until her husband left her and she found out she was pregnant again.
then don't have 7 kids... simple as that... some people can raise 7 kids without you know selling their name off on ebay! Here's the thing... you want to have 7 kids then you have a fund where if anything happens then you're safe to continue raising them fully and happily and not rely on everyone around. Does shit happen one can never plan for? yeah of course it does but if the dad isn¡'t paying support according to laws in the US he HAS to.
I'm sorry but I have no sympathy for what she's doing and if the man left her then he's as much to blame as her. Why did he leave her? I could give a rat's ass because if those are his children he needs to pay for her but is she at blame for it to? Oh gods yes because children happen to be a 50/50 deal.
I would not pay her and I believe in helping people out. How about offering babysitting and offering her a job because, beleive it or not, many jobs do not require a college degree and even if she does get one (a college degree) then she still needs to find someone to take care of the kids *while* she goes to her job until she gets paid... a lot... to buy food, clothing, diapers, and on top of all that uh daycare and can't her eldest (who is 19) babysit anyway? How about the 16 year old while she takes night classes or uh the 14 year old? Hm... yup still not seeing it.
No, that's called planning, not saying go back in time but sometimes our resources only go so far. See I'd love to buy a house and while I could put a downpayment on one it doesn't mean I am confident I wouldn't be a) broke after that and b) able to pay the rest of the payments and uh the morgage so what do I do *now*? Not buy a house her bed is made but maybe if people thought things true things like these wouldn't happen hm? Popping out kids is not like adopting puppies that you can take back to the pound... kids are yours far beyon the age of 18.
Her husband stills owes her child support by law... if she chooses not to file for that then that's on her. Also... then plan in case he does get laid of, in case something happens because shit happens, that's called reality. What if you go out today and gods forbid you're in an accident and somethig horrid happens? Where will your children go? what will they do... a child is not a puppy... a puppy you can easily give away or what not but you need to plan for your children. If your husband, again gods forcid, gets laid off then it'd be helpful to have a plan b. Of course not always be thinking it might happen but it's good to have savings, to have a backup, to know that if something were to happen you wouldn't be left on the streets or that your children would have a safe place to go even if it's not fancy, even if it's not as good as before... you don't have to resort to such things.
Oh and like I said before she said her house is way too small for the already 6 kids... Red flag on the whole having more or this would have surely been avoided in having less before, yes there is nothing she can do about that just saying why I don't feel like I need to sit here and say 'awww poor her!'. If you own a small home then try and keep the amount of children low to live comfortably. In case things happen, y'know.
(and for the record I didn't call you any names did I? no.. mature I'm sure)
Yeah, if you're a responsible parent, you have backup plans. Everyone is capable of saving money. If you aren't capable of putting money away for when things get shitty, you probably shouldn't be having 6 children. This is basically her plan b. She's not even filing for her husband's child support. Obviously not a good situation. And it's called foster care, that's where all this is leading. Or, she'll just get welfare and such and have to move somewhere smaller and such. And people actually struggling in this economy (aka, working for it!) can pay for her to go on with this nonsense.
Agreed. I started babysitting others when I was 13.. MAYBE 12, though I don't remember. I certainly was babysitting my little brothers at 12. All I remember is I was under 14, which is the minimum age here to get a "real" (aka McDonalds or a grocery store) job. So her kids could be working, and/or she could be working and have the kids watch her other kids. The whole situation is ridiculous.
Do you know how difficult it is for lower-middle class or working-class parents to save enough? Much less enough to support an 8-person family for 6 months or whatever the current ideas are about how much salary to save.
according to laws in the U.S.
Do you know how many fathers skip out on child support payments? And if he's not making much, then his support could be barely enough to feed them.
My dad skipped out on my mother when we lived in the US and not only that he left her with NO money. Like ZERO money... but you know what she had?= a plan B and she had money stored away for us and since we weren't even citizens I uh yeah have a pretty good idea how hard it is and since she couldn't poetition for child support since where we're from that doesn't happen then we were pretty fucked but her savings for us, for her family SAVED us from having to you know... auntion someone's name on the internet. We were residents of the US then so she did the best she coukld in our lower middle class american home.
Again, get over it... this is not a 'good' way out and you knwo what? It's sad and disgusting... if yopu want to keep argueing go right on ahead... people just need cop out sometimes and right now it's the economy well... like I said I've gone to real places with shit. I live in Venezuela and I am volunterring in Afria in the upcoming months for an orphanage of people that have NOTHING. Giving people money solves NOTHING. Giving them opportunities? That solves something but this is not offering any kind of opportunities.
If you read my above comments it shows that sometimes you have to look at all you ways out and sometimes people choose the simple and easiest way ('savng is too haaaard', 'this economy won't allowe me', 'the daycare is so expensive even though my other children who are perfectly old enough to can babysit', 'the father skipped out on them!', 'I'm selling my kids name on the internet for money!', etc) and if you want to go ahead and exccuse it then that's fine... I'm not going to. If the economy is so bad then someone is in pretty good shape to be offering 2,000 dollars (which was what the bid was up to last time I checked) to name a child.
Your mom is one person with one specific set of circumstances, and while her efforts are to be applauded, not everyone can do what she did.
I don't think it's a good way out, but I think people deriding this woman for having a 7th child without knowing her background and circumstances is reprehensible. It's the way we have been trained in this country -- instead of thinking that how many children you have shouldn't be dependent on your social status, we immediately place blame upon individuals rather than the lack of social support and welfare that exists for women -- especially women with large families and from low-income situations.
It's not about excusing. It's about not judging. You don't have the right to "excuse" her because no one asked you whether you should "let her off easy" or judge her guilty of...whatever...anyway. It's about taking a quick moment to think "maybe this woman fell upon really hard times and can't pull herself up by her bootstraps like that Horatio Alger myth and just really needs help, and maybe my comments mean nothing to her personal reality."
The article doesn't say anything about her husband leaving her...the eBay listing was removed, but the news article speaks as if they are still married and her husband is just stationed perhaps far away from her.
the news article says he's stationed in virginia and that she says he's probably going to be okay with her doing this because it's best for their family...?
I'm thinking some sort of scheme? I mean, the lady's already got 6 kids. She can't afford clothes for the new one, but she can afford to actually have it and raise it with her other 6?
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no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 04:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:09 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:26 am (UTC)If she needs the money she goes to court and there she goes in front of a judge to ask for child support and if he can't pay for it then uh we're back to square one! Don't have 6 kids if you can't afford 6 kids. Much less 7.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:38 am (UTC)If you read the ebay questions and answers you would see that they were doing just fine until her husband left her and she found out she was pregnant again.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 06:11 am (UTC)I'm sorry but I have no sympathy for what she's doing and if the man left her then he's as much to blame as her. Why did he leave her? I could give a rat's ass because if those are his children he needs to pay for her but is she at blame for it to? Oh gods yes because children happen to be a 50/50 deal.
I would not pay her and I believe in helping people out. How about offering babysitting and offering her a job because, beleive it or not, many jobs do not require a college degree and even if she does get one (a college degree) then she still needs to find someone to take care of the kids *while* she goes to her job until she gets paid... a lot... to buy food, clothing, diapers, and on top of all that uh daycare and can't her eldest (who is 19) babysit anyway? How about the 16 year old while she takes night classes or uh the 14 year old? Hm... yup still not seeing it.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 03:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:45 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-07 01:37 am (UTC)Her husband stills owes her child support by law... if she chooses not to file for that then that's on her. Also... then plan in case he does get laid of, in case something happens because shit happens, that's called reality. What if you go out today and gods forbid you're in an accident and somethig horrid happens? Where will your children go? what will they do... a child is not a puppy... a puppy you can easily give away or what not but you need to plan for your children. If your husband, again gods forcid, gets laid off then it'd be helpful to have a plan b. Of course not always be thinking it might happen but it's good to have savings, to have a backup, to know that if something were to happen you wouldn't be left on the streets or that your children would have a safe place to go even if it's not fancy, even if it's not as good as before... you don't have to resort to such things.
Oh and like I said before she said her house is way too small for the already 6 kids... Red flag on the whole having more or this would have surely been avoided in having less before, yes there is nothing she can do about that just saying why I don't feel like I need to sit here and say 'awww poor her!'. If you own a small home then try and keep the amount of children low to live comfortably. In case things happen, y'know.
(and for the record I didn't call you any names did I? no.. mature I'm sure)
no subject
Date: 2009-08-07 01:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 03:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-10 04:01 am (UTC)Do you know how difficult it is for lower-middle class or working-class parents to save enough? Much less enough to support an 8-person family for 6 months or whatever the current ideas are about how much salary to save.
according to laws in the U.S.
Do you know how many fathers skip out on child support payments? And if he's not making much, then his support could be barely enough to feed them.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-10 04:14 am (UTC)My dad skipped out on my mother when we lived in the US and not only that he left her with NO money. Like ZERO money... but you know what she had?= a plan B and she had money stored away for us and since we weren't even citizens I uh yeah have a pretty good idea how hard it is and since she couldn't poetition for child support since where we're from that doesn't happen then we were pretty fucked but her savings for us, for her family SAVED us from having to you know... auntion someone's name on the internet. We were residents of the US then so she did the best she coukld in our lower middle class american home.
Again, get over it... this is not a 'good' way out and you knwo what? It's sad and disgusting... if yopu want to keep argueing go right on ahead... people just need cop out sometimes and right now it's the economy well... like I said I've gone to real places with shit. I live in Venezuela and I am volunterring in Afria in the upcoming months for an orphanage of people that have NOTHING. Giving people money solves NOTHING. Giving them opportunities? That solves something but this is not offering any kind of opportunities.
If you read my above comments it shows that sometimes you have to look at all you ways out and sometimes people choose the simple and easiest way ('savng is too haaaard', 'this economy won't allowe me', 'the daycare is so expensive even though my other children who are perfectly old enough to can babysit', 'the father skipped out on them!', 'I'm selling my kids name on the internet for money!', etc) and if you want to go ahead and exccuse it then that's fine... I'm not going to. If the economy is so bad then someone is in pretty good shape to be offering 2,000 dollars (which was what the bid was up to last time I checked) to name a child.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-10 04:37 am (UTC)I don't think it's a good way out, but I think people deriding this woman for having a 7th child without knowing her background and circumstances is reprehensible. It's the way we have been trained in this country -- instead of thinking that how many children you have shouldn't be dependent on your social status, we immediately place blame upon individuals rather than the lack of social support and welfare that exists for women -- especially women with large families and from low-income situations.
It's not about excusing. It's about not judging. You don't have the right to "excuse" her because no one asked you whether you should "let her off easy" or judge her guilty of...whatever...anyway. It's about taking a quick moment to think "maybe this woman fell upon really hard times and can't pull herself up by her bootstraps like that Horatio Alger myth and just really needs help, and maybe my comments mean nothing to her personal reality."
no subject
Date: 2009-08-10 04:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 10:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 04:57 am (UTC)Something doesn't smell right.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-07 01:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 05:24 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 09:05 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-08-06 09:49 am (UTC)no one can be THAT much interested in naming kids.
no subject
Date: 2009-08-10 04:03 am (UTC)