Naming...

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

Okay. The ex and I are on a debate about what to name our daughter.

The name he wants to go with:
Bailey Jaimes Hannah ____
Now, I'm okay with Bailey... Baily Jaimes gives the intials BJ. His argument is, she doesn't have to tell anyone her middle name. He is STUCK on this name. *sigh*
I will NOT give my daughter the first name Hanna. It is a family name for him.. And well, his mother REALLY wants us to pick it. I hate his mother. I refuse to pick any name that she likes, so as not to give her the idea that I picked it for her or that she won in any way. (Immature of me, I know.. What's worse is, I like the name. But I can't, won't, will not do it)

I like Kyra Sage (now, we could either put Jaimes or Hannah here, I'm not oppose to either one as a middle name really, I am just opposed to BJ)
Kyra pronounced Ky-rah (rhymes with Tyra like Banks)

Now,  I know how a lot of you feel about 2 middle names, and I'm doing it anyway.. I have 2 and so does my sister lol. BUT I do ask, can you suggest any kind of comprimise between the two names. OR maybe, some ideas I can throw his way?? I mean, he is really stuck on this name. And while I'm not STUCK on my name, I really like it a lot.

Thanks guys!

Comments

[adamantplatypus.livejournal.com]

Try: "It's my daughter. When you carry a baby for 9 months, then go into labor and deliver something the size of a watermelon out of something the size of a grapefruit, then you can name it what you want."

[adamantplatypus.livejournal.com]

To expound: My mother did this with my name and INSISTED she was going to use it. I also decided that if my Ex-husband and I had kids and it was a boy, it WOULD NOT be named the 4th. I didn't give a fuck what the rest of his family thought about it, it would be MY KID and I would be doing the work bearing it.

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

If I could, I would. He is already on this kick of I'm not going to let him have anything to do with the parenting etc because I am so controlling. So I am trying to comprimise with him and work together, but he ain't budging. =/

[ifancylust.livejournal.com]

i like kyra sage better than bailey jaimes hannah. the spelling of jaimes is horrible and i hateeee hannah.

i don't mind two middle names. is there any way you guys can compromise? like using: kyra jaimes [another name you both can agree on]

[arbus.livejournal.com]

i think bailey is HORRIBLE. its a dogs name. can you imagine a grown woman named bailey? i cant. it doesnt fit anyone over the age of 5. i know a teenaged girl named bailey and its ridiculous. and BJ is just plain cruel.

jaimes is a terrible butchering.

and i am not a fan of kyra sage.

the only name i like out of all the ones listed is hannah (sorry!)

[thejoysofjess.livejournal.com]

I don't like James in the 2 middle name pile because it sounds like a last name. So it just seems like you're listing off two different kids. Bailey James and Hannah LastName.

I also don't like it because Jaimes looks bizarre.

[missinfinity.livejournal.com]

You could try telling him that Bailey is either a liquer or a jailer...

Kyra Grace? (Hannah means grace.)
Kyra James would work too, depending on your last name.


Also, based on your other comment, it sounds like he needs a bitchslap.

[274-days.livejournal.com]

I was going to suggest Kyra Jaimes...
I know you were asking for middle names with Kyra the other day, are there any others in the replies you got from that post that you guys *might* be able to compromise with?

I know what it's like, btw. Guys that wont budge on naming children, and are quite happy to subject them to a lifetime of horridness, should be shot. My daughter has my ex's last name (couldn't get her birth certificate without both parents signing for it), and his last name happens to be Chitty.
Yeah, like "Chitty Chitty Bang Bang"

[azelmaroark.livejournal.com]

I know a girl who GOES BY "BJ." ::shudder::

Bailey is cute on a dog or a four-year-old, but that is not a name for a grown woman. Jaimes is also terrible because of the kry8tv spelling. A random 'i' doesn't make it feminine; it makes it trashy. Maybe if you tell your husband (ETA: Ex, I reed gud) that she's going to have the trailer trash stigma follow her name for the rest of her life, that'll turn him around. =/

Also, IMO if one partner is absolutely opposed to a name, it shouldn't be used. You need to come up with something you both like. He can't cast an absolute veto any more than you can. I would suggest having both of you make lists of your favorite names and then going over them together and seeing which ones you both like (or at least can deal with). Use sites like Nymbler and etc to get you started.

I actually like Hannah *points to icon*, but if you're dead set against it, don't use it. Especially considering you're not even together with her son anymore, I see absolutely no reason why you need to keep in her good graces (and I wouldn't use a name just because an extended family member wanted me to even if I WERE still in a relationship with their child).

[daydream11.livejournal.com]

This, so much. :)

To the OP, I believe you should ditch both Bailey Jaimes Hannah and Kyra Sage altogether and start from scratch. There has to be other names in the world that you two both enjoy and that won't make your daughter sound like a guy and/or an eternal (to steal azelmaroark's words) four-year-old. (Kyra Sage gives me that eternal child impression, too.) If the ex is stuck on Jaimes, keep it as a middle name; I don't really see much harm in that, other than the way it's spelt.

[giveitfullheart.livejournal.com]

I definitely don't think it's a good idea to use the "I'm pushing it out so I'm naming it" argument (even though it should work that way :-P) just because you need to keep things as civil as possible between the two of you.

I have a hard time suggesting names with two middle names because they always sound like two separate kids to me lol...but I recommend both of you finding two names that you really like and trying to put them together. Or maybe get a list of names together that you like and a list of names he likes and then see which ones go the best. Maybe choose 10 names a piece and do it that way?

[limelight-lude.livejournal.com]

Bailey Sage Jaimes ___?

I have 2 mn's, it's no biggie.

[kitchen-poet.livejournal.com]

I really believe that if one person absolutely cannot stand one name, it shouldn't be used. Period. If neither of you likes the other's suggestions, you need to come up with a totally new one, then no one "gets their way".
I agree with the person who suggested nymbler as a way to start brainstorming.
Maybe say "Do you really want our daughter growing up with a name one parent can't stand? Really?" Chances are, he doesn't.

That said out of the names you listed, the only one that I can deal with is Sage.

I knew a girl named Bobbi Jean in middle school, and yes, she was teased about BJs ALL THE TIME. Seriously, every day. I felt really really bad for her.
Bailey is a dog's name and an alcohol. People don't name their babies Rover or Kahlua for a reason.
Jaimes is just horrible. James is better, I guess, but it really trendy and silly sounding on a girl.
Hanna(h) is just way too popular for my taste.
Kyra sounds way too trendy and made up and people will always call her Keera.

Maybe Sage James? Or:
Avery
Rhea
Calla
Nicolette
Adrienne
Willow
Macy

That was what I got out when I typed Bailey and Kyra into Nymbler. :)

[azelmaroark.livejournal.com]

ETA: Poked around Nymbler, and maybe this list will help you and your ex get started:

Ivy
Haley
Abigail
Kelsey
Aubrey
Gray
Phoebe
Ella (Perhaps as a nickname for Gabriella?)
Keira
Amelia
Cara
Claire
Cadence
Shana
Ainsley
Clara
Blythe/Blithe (This is one of the few names that I prefer with a 'y')
Reese
Sky(e)
Clarissa
Sloan
Brynn
Cora
Dawn
Blair(e)
Avril
Lyra
Cecilia
Paige
Julianne

Hope that helps!

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

I don't like Nymbler. it never seems to give me any names that I like, or any different names for that matter... They are always the same names, names I dont want to use. =/

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

That might work. He just keeps telling me "he's no good at this. He doesn't really like any names"

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

The spelling of Jaimes isn't meant to be "trendy". My cousin spells it that way for her middle name, AND, the reason the i is in there.. Is because if I had a boy I wanted to name him James. I told the ex that if I gave my DAUGHTER the name James, I could never name my son that. He said, well put an I in there and that way it wouldn't be the same.. Yeah.

[crzydimond.livejournal.com]

Jaimes is awful in any case, and I don't like Bailey on girls.

I don't mind Kyra Sage.

Oh and I know a girl named Belinda Jane who actually goes by BJ as a nickname and no one ever mentions the obvious associations.

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

Oh wow, I'm really surprised that he had to sign it... And I would have punched him in the jugular lol

Thats up there with calling your daughter BJ, although, not quite as bad.

[krosp.livejournal.com]

I know a boy who has always gone by BJ too and still continues to do so, so presumably he doesn't get too much crap.

I do know the association, but maybe it's not such a big deal here in aus?

[274-days.livejournal.com]

Mmm...unless you can prove (with a Death Certificate) that they've passed away, or have some form of statuatory declaration saying you have no clue who the father is (I guess in the case of rape, or some such other case), they need to have signed it too.
I guess that's a fair enough rule, but really, being so tied up in him at the time and (hormonal!), stupidly agreeing to have his surname for our child was also my mistake.
I just cant change it without his permission, and he refuses to now, despite whingeing to me contantly that he was always teased for it!!!

Haha, oh well, I guess we learn along the way.
Good luck with yours, I hope it turns out ok.

[274-days.livejournal.com]

agreed...I dont know any 'BJ's' but I didnt make the association immediately

[274-days.livejournal.com]

There were two girls in my school who were named Tia & Astie, after their mother's favourite alcoholic beverages.
(Tia Maria, Astie Spumante)
Pity though, as I actually like Tia

[crzydimond.livejournal.com]

Yeah maybe! Perhaps kids are just nicer here lol.

[giveitfullheart.livejournal.com]

Then maybe he should let you decide :)
You guys will come up with something you can agree on!

[sarahness.livejournal.com]

The initials, to me, aren't a big deal (I live in the US and I've gone to school with a couple BJs and they never really got crap about it), but Bailey Jaimes looks and sounds like a boys' name to me. And to pair it with an ultra feminine name like Hannah, it just sounds awkward.

In his defense, I don't groove too much on Kyra Sage either (although it's leaps and bounds better than Bailey Jaimes), so it might be about starting from scratch (as frustrating as that thought may be).

[harri-cady.livejournal.com]

Kyra - you're going to get a lot of "kee-rah" I think. I do like it, but she'll have to correct people a lot.

Bailey to me is sort of like a pet's name. IDK, maybe just me.

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

Thanks!

=]

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

Here, its less bad for a boy to go by that name.
IDK why, but in my area the poor girl would get torn apart, while any boy would get left alone.. In fact his pals might laugh about it.

I guess I come from a really immature area. ha.

[politicking.livejournal.com]

Honestly, if you like the name Hanna/h enough to use it, do it. Once the kid gets here it's not going to be like "bwhaha I won, you named the baby a name I love!"

I had a very meddling mother in law when I was with my son's father. She HATED every single effing name I picked out. So did he. In the end, I settled on a name that I truly did not love and I do regret not standing my ground about certain names.

My son also has two middle names, btw.

I really like Kyra, but I would not put Hannah with it. I also am not a fan of Jaimes. When I read it, I feel like someone forgot an apostrophe and they were saying "Jaime's"

[politicking.livejournal.com]

I know a few kids whose initials (either first + middle or first + last) were BJ... I don't recall them ever getting flack about it. Especially since a lot of kids didn't know their middle names anyway.

[politicking.livejournal.com]

So if you name your daughter Jaimes, you could still use it on your son (but as James), because it wouldn't be the same name? I was a little confused on how you worded the last part of your comment lol

[sleepy-tears7.livejournal.com]

Thats what the ex is saying. =/ Yeeeah.